What I Learned | Spring 2018
Every season, we gather over at Emily P. Freeman's place and share the lessons we've learned. When I think about the seasons of life - the season of rest, of growth, of pruning and of harvest, I sometimes have a difficult time distinguishing the one I'm currently in. It can be frustrating when life events don't come with a label like the little seed packets that line the shelves at the garden center. It's only in retrospect when you realize how much pruning or growth or harvesting you've been able to do.
Here's what I learned this spring:
It's easy to waste time on mindless tasks.
I started this season with a new rule: no social media until I do at least three productive things. I had begun to notice how easy it was to wake up, grab my phone, scroll through Facebook, catch up on Instagram stories or jump into a conversation on Twitter, all before I rolled out of bed in the morning. I would have consumed so much time and energy on nothing that mattered and would be exhausted because of all the heavy news headlines, drama from other people and the general noise that comes with online feeds. When I started guarding my time like a watchman, I became more productive and wasn't as distracted by the chaos that didn't belong to me.
It's easy to get sucked into someone else's bad vibes.
A couple months ago, I was listening to a reiki therapist talking about how we needed to guard our energy. She wasn't talking about our physical energy, rather our spiritual energy. She said that our energetic selves were much like the surface of a lint roller, picking up the dust and debris from everything around us. Whether you are into the belief of spiritual energy or not, I think we all can agree that if you hang around a chronically negative person, some of that negative energy tends to rub off. I learned that I need to guard my energy and protect it from sucking up the bad vibes from the people around me.
Even the pros get scared sometimes.
While listening to one of my favorite writers give a talk on a panel recently, she mentioned that even she gets overwhelmed by imposter syndrome. She gets scared before submitting a new piece she's written, thinking it won't be enough to get published. She looks at herself in the mirror and asks, "Who do you think you are?" This is a woman who has written five books and has had countless articles and essays featured in notable publications such as The New York Times, The Guardian, and The Atlantic. This put my own experience into perspective. It encouraged me to keep trying, to push my fear to the side, and to keep writing and submitting. It's only fear that has held me back.
Journaling does a heart good.
I've been journaling since I first sought help for my mental health nearly fifteen years ago. Over the course of that time, I've tried many different methods of journaling, from the daily "dear diary" to working through some heavy things in essay form. This season, I switched up my gratitude journaling routine and tried something a little different, and was excited about how I felt after a few weeks of implementing the changes. I usually spend 5-10 minutes every morning or evening and it's been a game-changer. (P.S. Any interest in a post on this new journaling routine/format?)
Crab pots need time to soak. (A parable)
Anyone who knows me will know that I'm addicted to the Discovery Channel's Deadliest Catch. It's a show about crab fishermen out in the Bering Sea off the coast of Alaska. In this most recent season, there was a rookie boat captain who was struggling to find the crab. He was dropping his pots into the water and pulling them back up a few hours later with nothing to keep. One of the veteran captains was on the radio with him trying to encourage him and something he said pricked my ear. "Crab pots need time to soak." Rather than pulling them up every twelve hours, this rookie should have been letting them soak for thirty-six hours before pulling them. Like many things in life, you apparently can't rush crab.
It's the small things that matter.
I had a conversation with a friend several weeks ago and we were talking about our general dislike for dating in our late thirties. So many people in our age bracket are consumed with money and careers and material things and we (both coming from failed marriages and many broken relationships) agreed that that's not what is important at the end of the day. It's the small things that matter like having someone to cook dinner with, sharing your favorite passage from a book you're reading, or catching them smiling at you out of the blue. It's about the moments made with the people you love, and no amount of money or any job title could ever take the place of that.
